worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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