hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
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