I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
