Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
