The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
Randomize