He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
