I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
