I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
