Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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