It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Randomize
