Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize