On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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