The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
She told me I should be a condom model.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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