You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
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