It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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