it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
