You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
