thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Randomize
