quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Randomize
