hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
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