i already hear my dad disowning me
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Randomize
