I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Randomize
