glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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