those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
