I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Randomize