I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
