He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
