Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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