at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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