porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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