Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize