I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
