Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
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