no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Randomize