Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize