so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
