Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Randomize
