If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Just puked most of my soul out..
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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