I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
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