My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Randomize
