Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
is that a dick in a sweater?
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
