I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize