Tell her she can't have a vagina
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize