You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Randomize