what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
