PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Randomize
