Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Randomize
