But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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