no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
