I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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