I can feel you judging me through the phone.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
